Sunday, 03 February 2008

• don't let me peak.

  
  i'll yield a confession.
  
  i've come as far as i can alone in this path of self development.  everything and anything from here on out is pure entertainment;  pure twiddling of my thumbs out of sheer boredom.  any further growth is going to require the influence of someone better, someone more powerful, someone smarter.
  
  yes, i said it.  someone smarter.
  
  i always thought i'd get to the top of the cliff and jump for joy;  scream for the excitement of the accomplishment.  it was always about getting stronger;  being the strongest.  instead i find myself sitting here wondering what the next challenge will be.
  
  everything is so monotonous when you reach a point where nothing, and nobody, is capable of surprising you anymore.  it's a conundrum in itself because nothing loses its beauty.  in fact, beauty in all things is amplified.  but... being awestruck by that beauty becomes a rarity, whereas before staring in wonder at it with new eyes each time was commonplace.
  
  twiddle-dee-dee.
  
  

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